'Just one more, then I've really got to get back to
those hedge funds'
The
Government today introduced strict new laws to prevent finance workers from
trading while under the influence of alcohol. City insiders say that the
practice is rife among bankers when they are not experimenting with LSD or
mainlining heroin. However, a recent study has found that drinking can make
some figures appear more attractive than they actually are, and can lead to an
inflated opinion of one loan’s worth. In one unfortunate case a banker woke
up with a portfolio of toxic debt that only hours before he had jokingly
dismissed as ‘an eight-pinter at best’. The study also warned that excessive
banking can lead to blindness, but said that heroin is fine.
